“Intense darkness is daybreak’s preamble.”
A moment when quietness feels heaviest, darkest when the light becomes known, and both our eyes and heart can truly understand the darkness for what it is - something needed but something entirely momentary.
When the sun rises just enough to cast its great light but does not sufficiently crest the horizon.
Sunrises are difficult things, for once your eyes catch the brilliance of the light itself, they cannot see anything but a ball of light wherever they look. Such is the power of light.
-Paraphrased from ‘Wild Like Flowers’ by Daniel Firth Griffith
Pain
I spent the last week visiting small, human-scale farms from Virginia to Maryland filming a documentary that challenges everything we thought we knew about regenerative agriculture. How do we bring the humanity back into the conversation of ecosystem restoration? How do we heal the soul as we heal the soil? We can’t have true regeneration if communities are dying and farmers aren’t thriving. Even if we do have soil regeneration now because we have tech and corporate interest, how long will that last? Will it really be stable organic matter, locked in the soil for generations to come? If we don’t have people in place to nurture the land who really actually care about their communities then it will be temporary at best.
As I sit here and integrate that experience, I am feeling the weight of it. We were asking these farmers to be real, raw, authentic. What challenges were they going through? Has the recent increase in companies and organizations claiming to be supportive of regenerative practices actually helped small farmers? Will we have good people growing good food that heals the environment in years to come? Will my generation and my kids be able to find healthy, local food grown by their neighbors?
I’m feeling the emotions and trying not to attach to them as I stare this potential reality in the face and grapple with where to go from here. The thing is, I mentally knew a lot of this, I have many farmer friends who I know are in the same boat. But like many of us, we often don’t show when we are struggling, and farmers especially are the types that like to give and give and give and never ask for anything in return. So when we visited and asked them to share honestly, and went to the uncomfortable place with them to pull from the depths how they are really doing, and felt it with them, and sat with them in their pain and did not look away…it was a lot. To FEEL what they are feeling, to really experience it, to sit in the pain….
I can stand what I see.
I will not look away.
I will not numb to the pain.
I will not paint all love and light and hope.
I want to live in a world that is real and raw and authentic.
Not one masquerading that everything is fine and distracting our attention with addictions and comforts.
The depth of pain was real, and it was felt. We tried to all hold the burden together, to relieve their load, if only for a little while.
Farms are the Backbone of Community
And it is in these moments of deep pain, that joy and beauty are known more intimately. When the quietness feels heaviest, the light becomes known but has not sufficiently crested the horizon.
The generosity, compassion, healing, and positivity that all these families showed to us, and was so present in the energy of their land, was miraculous. Not ignoring the dark, not numbing to the pain, but leaning into it and choosing to find the beauty, again and again. Nature proving to us that life persists, even in the worst of conditions. We take and we take and we take, and she still gives, without expectation.
I’ll be showcasing these farms in the upcoming week and talking about how they do things differently. The health, regeneration and community support that human-scale farming brings to landscapes and communities is unparalleled. So real and raw and authentic, not the feeling of being taken advantage of or being lied to. Vibrancy and abundance, collaboration not competition. Giving to give, not for self-interest or adulation.
It reminds me of a recent clip I heard from Dr. Gabor Mate and Rich Roll on the genocide of authenticity, addiction, inadequacy, and healing.
For me, it’s these types of people, living close to nature, with a purpose to serve and do what is right, to nurture their community no matter what, enduring sacrifice in order to give, that fill me with courage to live as my authentic self and continue to find deep meaning in this thing we call life.
Community farm dinner at Backbone Hemp Farm
Purpose - Common Wealth Network
The reason I am here telling you this story is because of the work of Commons Provisions, a community of human-scale, verified regenerative, small family farms that center around biodiversity, wildness, and providing continued mentor-ship, education and resources for farmers to continue to thrive. Plus experiences for you to engage with your community and the landscape to enhance healing, authenticity, and vitality.
There are numerous reasons why Commons is unique and gives me such hope for a better food system and culture, but one of the main ones I want to highlight right away is that the focus is on empowering farmers to thrive and continuing to nurture the land and the community far into the future. 84% of every dollar spent goes directly to farmers, compared to 14% at grocery chains and other commodity markets. Commons also supports the human-scale, small family farm. Farms ranging from 3 acres to 800 acres, so that more farms can be supported, more families can succeed at farming, and we can scale the regenerative agriculture movement by keeping it small.
Restoring relationship, that is regeneration.
A Poem
Heavy. We all feel the weight These farmer’s stories... The failed USDA grant - the facade. Top down will never work. No relationship. No authenticity. Funding the same organizations that are part of the problem, just with a new brand. Heavy. Does Commons even exist? Where do we go from here? And yet, I feel hopeful. I feel steady, grounded, anchored Heavy…on this Earth. Boots on the ground, we march forward. Intense darkness is daybreak’s preamble.
My Purpose - Persuade Me What I Am
Nature as teacher.
Shakespeare, As You Like It:
“Here we feel not the penalty of Adam.
Even till I shrink with cold, I smile, and say
‘This is no flattery. These are counsellors
That feelingly persuade me what I am.’”
The lesson of the seasons is not to understand natural patterns, but to find oneself. Persuade me what I am.
The tension between the wild and the artificial. That which is beyond the unqualified power of self-interest and adulation.
-Paraphrased from ‘Wild Like Flowers’ by Daniel Firth Griffith